I have a feeling that I'll be wearing white pants after Labor Day. #rebel

"You guys got the best girls during recruitment". Tell me something I don't already know.

I'M BACK, bitches. And by bitches, I really mean "my oh so lovely followers".

"I ain't talking poultry when I say this chicken is friiiied". I don't know what that means but it is hilario

Turning into a ninja and avoiding that one creepy relative that comes every Christmas. Or is that just me?

Snapchatting my way to embarrassment. #noshame

All these horny anon accounts... no, just no.

If you screen shot me doing a triple chin face on snap chat, you are on my shit list. #SoNotFair #ComeOnnnn

Merry Christmas Eve! 😍

I'm in desperate need of some summer lovin'. ☀🌊🌴💚🏊😍

I could go for a cherry limeade right about now. #mmm

It's almost April and it's freezing. OKAY COOL.

There are some crazy people on twitter. 😳

It's such a pretty day outside. Feeling extremely blessed right now. 😊

Why yes, yes I would like some whine with my cheese.

But seriously, go away. No one understands why you're even here.

It's only ten and I'm already sleepy! You can call me grandma

COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE, you complete me

Sitting at Starbucks and this guy next to me tells me he thinks the stock market is pointless and should be removed. Uhh, no.

My favorite veggie? Karats. Lots of em. #DiamondsAreAGirlsBestFriend #BlingBling