i’m always kidding unless you’re down

entering my villain era (my birthday month)

I don’t know why I thought I could chug a super mimosas in 10 min…I died after 2 minutes.

Mimosas : 3 Me : 0

A Virgo is the balance you need in your life.

fuck a breakup, you ever give someone an excuse not to link up and they got solutions 😭

Me at work complaining Vs. When I get offf how tired I'm

If you don't have THAT scar on your knee you didn't have a fun childhood

i know it’s not december 31st but i’m just going to call it right now: this year has been a very fucking hard year. it was hellish. 1/10

As a Virgo, I wish it was socially acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away from the conversation.

I have one rule, tell me before I find out

The best thing I did last year was getting knee surgery . This is the first winter in years where I don’t have knee pain .

THE MOST IMPORTANT LIFE LESSON: bring your own vehicle to an event so you can leave when you want

I think I’m officially to old for a super mimosas .

I suck at being in group chats. First time they get to talking too much.....DND😭😭😭

I aint ugly but if you see me at work idk what to tell you😂

The waiter said there’s no sopa de gallina india because the gallina that they were going to use for the soup escaped.

“always start your day with a positive attitude” me at 7 am: