Ooo Girl!! Shock me like an electric eal!!! Haha MGMT-Electric Feel has been playing in my head all day!

What if Shearer turned up one week with a full head of hair and refused to admit he used to be bald. Is there a plan in place for that?

Red card in the league cup for celebrating is well funny

Funny tweet, but are we just pretending Carragher was wrong about us? The preponderance of evidence suggests, that the people in charge at Chelsea DO care more about the transfer balance sheet than the league table.

This is a dreadful first touch

Good morning

CC: Cole Palmer

Louis Theroux has interviewed actual nazis, by the way. Didn't lose any funding/sponsors/opportunities for that.

Stop blaming the poor This country isn’t poorer because disabled people get £100 a week or asylum seekers get £49 a wk It’s poorer because the very rich dodge £35 billion a year — and £100 billion a year flows into British enabled tax havens We’re not broke We’re being robbed

Holy moly… x.com/browlytopersv/…

My toastie maker in the back of the cupboard getting ready for its annual 7 day stint

Getting significant “surely he’s managed Watford already?” vibes from some of this lot.

If you’re in the pub tonight have a look around you. Memorise the faces. These are the real ones. Mid-week November, no football on, just pints and chat. These are the people that deserve seats in the summer when all the part-timers appear because the suns out. Proper boozers.

This is the funniest tweet I've seen in ages, and I live here.

No offence to any of them, but I absolutely hate seeing commentator’s faces

8.

I see they’re pulling this lever again