in a monogamous relationship with the bit

waist? Snatched. the world? My oyster.

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch love island like men do with sports

Idk, I’m ready to be at the airport again.

Banana peppers and jalapeños/hot peppers takes every sandwich to another level

my new bit is just saying "allegedly" to things that i have very clearly done

"I don't let my dog sleep in my bed" I would let my dog steal my identity and open credit cards in my name if she wanted to

i don't get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am

I know the Bears are bad but it’s only been 1 game!

bilf (book i’d like to finish)

this is how i look at the flight attendant so she knows im awake and want a treat

they should make a statue of the person who invented nerd gummy clusters like what a contribution to society

Ummmm no I don’t watch “Instagram Reels.” I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source

I wanna say “fck this job” every day but it's actually a cool job I just be wanting to lay down

in addition to being a sweet gentle girl I am also deeply angry and violent. this is endearing to right person I’m sure

Lost my car chapstick so now my bag chapstick is in my car & I had to replace it with my nightstand chapstick so now everything is a fucking mess.

I love vanilla scents I want to be vanilla

bad news for chocolate chip cookies: i woke up today

unfortunately i’m not addicted to the grind i am addicted to the unwind i love chilling and relaxation and overall taking it easy