The hard part about going through a breakup when no one liked your partner is the lack of empathy 😭 no one cares bc you’re finally free but damn

noooo my eggs :( they were all in that basket

500 retweets and I’ll reveal why we call ourselves QT

37 song break up album, the timing is impeccable thanks Wallen

Mind if a white boy speaks a little bit of patriotism? Didn’t think so. #BlueAngels

the gap in my resume? yeah it’s called playing outside

0 SEC titles

They just pretend to be two parties. It’s just one uniparty in reality.

Whatever happened calorically this weekend can never happen again

Told chat GPT how my relationship ended and the response was actually fucking insane

Cancel my plans for August 30th. 12pm -- Texas vs. Ohio State 3:30pm -- Alabama vs. Florida State 7:30pm -- LSU vs. Clemson 11:00pm -- Utah vs. UCLA

"i asked chatgpt" "i asked grok" well i asked Nick Saban and he said he wasn’t going to so quit asking

things were better when the computer lived in its own specific room and you only went in there sometimes

gf says because we got chinese yesterday we can’t get it again today. i don’t think that makes sense . they do it in china all the time

Absolute gem at the grandparents house

College football is back

Two small children will now grow up without a father because politics have become people’s religion.