I turned on Beyoncé album and a mimosa poured itself.

if i fall asleep in vc someone better tuck me in

in my brain it is now the holidays. do not schedule meetings with me. do not follow up with me. we can talk in january

Unbelievable

can’t talk, having my bi-yearly mourning sesh over the fumbling of electing Bernie Sanders

The average arc of my day

This genuinely isn’t satire LMAO god I love when the right isn’t trying to be funny

sorry that deliverable took me so long i really didn't want to do it

hispanic heritage month begins tomorrow make sure you venmo $10 to one of your hispanic friends or else you're racist

work emails are turn-based combat

Yearning is out, delusions of grandeur are in

made up a situation. i’m pissed

yall on linkedin, im on lockedin

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”