My mom informed me the plates we’ve been eating off of for more then 27 years have lead in them, so that’s nice :)

I’ve been waiting 7 weeks for a fucking debit card replacement - it’s fucking ridiculous

Can we just trade Kylie Jenner and Hailey Bieber for Steve’s Irwin? Please?

Just so y’all know - when Cricket dies I am for sure offing myself ♥️

I want to start dating again

But thinking about the talking stage makes me physically ill

That is… that is literally what a vaccine is, Elon…

No one

I repeat

NO ONE

Gives a shit about your multi level marketing scheme. Stop trying to sell me shitty makeup and try running an ACTUAL small business.

Thanks ♥️😘

DEAR GOD

Watching Simon smile at Caly Baby 🥹🥹 crying all over again

cool cool cool

nooo it’s fine, everything’s fine

The best thing my town has is a full service gas station and I don’t have to get out of my car 😩

🌱🪴

ive decided being from iowa is hot and mysterious .

“… you know it’s not the same as it was….”

2021. 2022

My 15 year old cousin trying to explain Be Real to me made me feel the most geriatric I have EVER felt. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Last night my heated blanket I bought two months ago CAUGHT FIRE. So. That’s fun.

My Mom had to buy a lava lamp for my aunt for Christmas, the only place she could find them??

SPENCERS.

My 60 year old, VERY CHRISTIAN Mother, WENT TO SPENCERS 😂

Time to play my favorite Midwest game;

Where the FUCK are the lines for the parking spots?!?