Busted for code violation 🙄 #alizecornet took 10 sec to turn top right way but #novacdjokovic can sit for minutes half-naked. Same comp. Days after Serena Williams slammed for disrespecting tennis because she wore a #catsuit. Not fair. Not right. Tell your daughters 🙌

Explaining the difference between an Athletic Trainer and a personal trainer is so old it hurts me to have to do. Sending someone an lmgtfy.com never gets old.

Thought I saw a glimpse of a sense of humor, but then no❌ Asks questions that are clearly indicative of illiteracy or ignorance since the first 2 words of my profile say where I’m from❌ Staying at the frat house apartments & maybe still a frat boy, even at 37❌ And you’re out.

Thank goodness someone gets this!

😂😂😂

6 y/o nephew walks out of the bathroom last night with the biggest grin on his face: “Guess what?!! I just found a spot on my penis that is sooo ticklish! It’s like the most ticklish spot on my whole body!!” 😶😂

Stop telling me what to be

No wonder our government has so many issues when its employees can’t spell “serious,” “matter,” or even the word “government.”

All I’m looking for a man to tell me:

Fake news: The size of a guy’s hands/feet is proportional to other things.

😂 yes!!

Hey Bumble, what’s the point of giving me a radius setting if you don’t clear out the pending match queue when they or I am no longer in that radius. Idk what you changed semi-recently but it sucks.

The dumbest description of oneself comes in the form of “I have a good personality.” Doesn’t everyone, or at least the majority of people, think they have a “good personality?”

First date planning is ridiculous: two complete strangers trying to make a decision on a restaurant they will both enjoy. Two best friends have a hard enough time deciding on a restaurant they both want to eat at, let alone two strangers!

So true.

Working out my time table: It’s 2 pm now.... 7 pm date... Need to leave 30 mins ahead to get there... Need at least 1.5 hrs to shower and get ready... That puts me at 5 pm... Shoot!! I better hurry up and take a nap or I’m not going to have time! 😅😴

People always think I’m racing them on the freeway. I’m not. I’m simply chronically late. Like, chronically. 🏁

Men: if you want to score a couple extra points with your date, ask her to text you and let you know when she gets home safely from the date. I’m an independent woman and don’t need to be checked on, and still that request earns bonus points from me every time.

While watching a movie tonight (as part of the first date), the professor turned to me and asked “Are your feet cute and little? Can I see them?” Creep factor 🚀⬆️ Dude, we’ve never even kissed. Not ready to find out about your religion-caused closeted fetishes.

As we said goodbye, the professor told me how beautiful, smart, and funny I am. I’m fairly certain that trifecta is also the reason why I’m still single but I resisted the urge to tell him so