This is an apology to my mom for all the times she came home from a long day of work and my unemployed teenage self had the audacity not to have done the simple tasks she asked of me. I get it now.

The Mauler Twins are dumb and smart at the same time 😂 The original one probably died a long time ago 😭

the flag the opportunities

They should change the name to "Strait of Schrödinger". It's both open and closed at the same time.

Today’s to do list: 1. Bite off more than I can chew 2. Build Rome in one day 3. Poke a bear with a stick 4. Beat a dead horse 5. Skate on thin ice

Me tryna survive the remaining days until payday 😭

There's 2 birds throwing stones at me

Appeal. Lost my wallet containing Zimbabwe ID, UK Driver's license, Bank cards , Santander,Revolut, Starling on Friday evening. I probably dropped it on Hardy Close Vainona, Harare when I jumped out of tgd car to take over the driver's seat after the journey from Njanja

The Chinese man who invented the camera lens has passed away. Rest in peace, Zoo Min.

commuting an hour to work just to use a laptop that was already at home

company: we’re hiring! me: *applies* company:

finally a shoe that can kill bugs in the corner of rooms

Yet another beautiful day stolen by the shackles of employment.

can't believe it's almost may. time flies when you work every day of your fucking life

The genie said "I grant you one wish. You must pick between wealth, wisdom or fame." "I choose wisdom." "Granted." "I should have taken the money."

Corporate life is mostly pretending you didn’t see that email until you’re emotionally ready

The speed at which a virus spreads depends on: 1. How dense the population is 2. How dense the population is