Born in the USA is about the guys who got drafted and fought in Vietnam. The Boys Are Back in Town are about the guys who failed drug tests or hid in Canada. Everybody is a hero.

Good ol’ slick bobby, at it again

I mean who played better defense than the 2004 Pistons? Let’s hear him out!

I forgot to retweet this as soon as the #stlcards season was over b/c I didn’t know they were still playing. Go apathy!!

[Ray Liotta in Goofellas voice]:

I still don’t believe “Here” is an actual movie. Somebody is tricking us.

Thanks to all you rubes that wasted hours of your life to stand in line and vote early, I was in and out of the Webster Groves library in 10 minutes. #vote

America this morning (I’m Marge)

Maybe Sideshow Bob was right.

249 years young. HBD, Marines.

(Me after a solo dad weekend) “hear me out… weekend school!”

“Netflix’s chances of ever streaming a Super Bowl are literally flying out of the arena!”

More like Michael Buffering

Shout out to the panini press we got during the GWB administration and only use once a year, the weekend after thanksgiving, to make left over sandos. Still going strong, sir 🫡

History’s greatest monster. RIP.

“Please Stop Yelling At Us: A Couples Descent Into Madness When School Is Closed The First Day After Christmas Break” by me

The year is 2067. To this day, no NFC North team that plays in a dome has won the Super Bowl.

What the fuck was that?

I'm starting to think this Trump fella isn't on the level.