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"Whaat... on earth..?" "What the fuck?" "What in the.. huh?? What the shit??" "WHAAAAT the dang fuck" (My ancestors and guardian angels watching me trying to drive to the bank but going the wrong way seven different times)

"That homeless guys just gonna use that money for drugs!" My brother in Christ, your donations to nonprofits are fueling like 4 coke habits

Thanks for your understanding while I stomp my breaks to the beat of the Cranberries when I'm dropping the kids off at school

Still thinking about how yesterday afternoon I really told everyone I walked by to have a good weekend. Yesterday was Wednesday.

You deserve to be as happy as a creek

Hot take that's about to get me canceled: there are Disney songs that are way slappier than We Don't Talk About Bruno

People infodumping on me is my genuine favorite. Free social interaction without having to come up with things to talk about. I'm cheating the system.

Pour your word barfs directly into my ears.

I'm happy to report that after an hour of being hungry and sad, I discovered snack I had set down next to me an hour ago

My face when I'm being sucker punched by overstimulation and sensory overload 😐

Struggling? Always seek help But not from your elders bc theyll just tell you to go outside or be positive But not your friends bc thats overwhelming to them and what can they do anyway But not online bc thats a mixed bag of bad advice But not professionals bc theyll dismiss you

Some folks just don't understand meditation is an all weather sport. Sit angry, sit sad, as well as sitting happy. Sitting only in the good parts doesn't always flex the muscle sport to speak

I wish I could just enjoy a picture of sunlight streaming through the trees but I'm ex-Mormon so instead I have to violently gag

It's a great day to be actively insane

I don't belong here. I don't know where I belong, but it's not here.

Things change real quick once you realize there isn't a divine justice system

Please tell me I'm not the only one who remembers in the early 2000s Crest came out with a line of limited edition flavors? I distinctly remember the vanilla and orange ones, and feel like there was a third. Anyway I'm going to need those to make a comeback.

You have a beautiful soul and you cannot convince me otherwise.

Advice from mycelium: -Share what you have. Give and accept. -Look out for your community. -Love the dirt. -Make friends with trees. -Learn to communicate with others. -Embrace hiding under leaves as well as standing tall.

I need a Maycation; I may come back or I may not (preferably not)