The Year 11 French Memrise group are off to a really great start- with this student in particular gaining 1.2 MILLION points!!!!!!!! We are incredibly proud of you all. Claire Harding

What better way to celebrate #MyTwitterAnniversary than by sharing a photo from todays inspirational #pgcementor #itt #pgce mentor training session today at the #universityofsouthampton #mfl #teacher #uclmentor #headoflanguages #teachertrainer #teachertraining #ect

Hi all, From next half term, can you all please bring some marking or planning with you to every meeting and briefing. Sometimes meetings under-run and we need to keep you all there to make sure you are all doing your minimum 1265 hours. Thanks x

Hi all, Tomorrow you will be given a new fob to sign in and out of The Academy. At the end of each week this new system will allow us to publish a list of who the hardest working teachers are, ie those who are here the longest, and also who the skivers are. Thanks x

Teachers leaving work on a Friday mentally and physically dead to the world and incapable of life and then only partially recovering by Monday is why we are in the mess we are. Because if you do that time and again, you burnout.

Hi all, For Tuesday’s CPD we’ll be doing a different kind of ice breaker task. The boiler burst on Wednesday, flooded the ground floor and all the water froze. It’s about 6 inches thick. You’ll need to bring hammers, salt, a lot of towels and ice skates. Thanks x

Hi all, I just noticed another spelling error in the staff bulletin. It should say, “Pay your milk club subs to Tina.” not “Pay your milf club subs to Tina.” At least, I hope it’s an error. Thanks x

Hey Mercia School Stop pinching my ideas! Thanks x

Hi all, We’ve appointed Ms Jenkins as the new Assistant Assistant Assistant Vice Assistant Principal to the Vice Principal’s Assistant. Her lack of experience, refusal to answer any questions directly, and her ability to totter about in 5 inch heels won the panel over. Thanks x

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Hi all, Thanks to all who presented at the Well Being conference on Saturday. We loved Steve’s talk about how he marks 2 sets of books before and after school each day and then Gemma told us how she takes every Monday off, crying curled up in the foetal position all day. Thanks x

It makes me sad when children have large chunks of their education frittered away by the disruptive behaviour of one or two of their classmates. They only get one go at school.

Hi all, We’ve changed the requirements for a Prom Ticket. Students will be allowed to go to Prom even if they don’t meet any of the criteria published in April. As long as they apologise to the Head of Year whilst staring at their shoes so as not to laugh, they’ll be OK. Thanks x

Hi all, As we care about your Well-Being and Work Life Balance, we have decided that, from September, you will no longer be required to respond to any Academy emails between the hours of midnight and 5:30am. At weekends. Unless it’s marked URGENT. Obviously. Thanks x

Hi all, Just one more exclusion will trigger another Ofsted inspection, so can you please start to be more lenient to our less-than-cooperative pupils. Turn a deaf ear to their swearing, a blind eye to the violence and theft and we’ll all be OK for the rest of the year. Thanks x

Hi all, To show our appreciation for all the hard work you do, we are going to get the pupils to clap for two minutes during each assembly. This will be instead of any pay rises over the next year. It seemed to work for the nurses. Thanks x

Hi all, Tomorrow’s twilight CPD is the one we had to postpone from September so that our CEO could rant about exam results for four hours. So, meet in the Main Hall at 4pm for “Ice Breakers - Getting To Know Our New Staff”. Actually almost all of them have left. Thanks x

Hi all, Can the more ambitious among you please stop asking us to fund your NPQH courses? We already have one Needy, Pathetic, Questionable Headteacher, we don’t need anymore. Thanks x

The amount of teachers who say ‘if I could just have X% less teaching contact time and more free periods than I do now, I would LOVE my job, but as it is, I can barely stay afloat’ is staggering. Significantly more PPA/free time would absolutely be the game changer the

S - start L - listening (to) A - actual N - (not just claiming to be) T - teachers