I'm back 😳😳😳😊😊😊#41

#BREAKING: Statement from Susan Long, co-directer of Transitional Records Access Clearinghouse on the lawsuit.

This horrible event in Times Square looks like DWI, which kills *thousands of more people a year than terrorism* so we can ignore it.

May I Have This Dance - Francis and The lights & Chance The Rapper

"A source close to the investigation would not disclose the name of the person of interest but noted it rhymes with Bared Tushner."

Love the idea PBS. Assuming you were inspired by an award-winning show in upstate NY Mike Riccardi Josh M. Carney Joseph Lino @jsnair98 x.com/NewsHour/statu…

Big B's soundcloud.com/chancetherappe…

"Replying all" to tell everyone to stop replying all, is just as bad as replying all.

I wish there was a Shazam for smells.

Dear @SeanSpicer Please write a book. Immediately.

"Hot takes are the easier, lazier way to cover sports" x.com/TheHerd/status…

BREAKING: Barcelona mayor: Over 460 injured in Catalonia in dispute with Spanish police over independence vote.

So, viagra is covered, but contraception isn’t? Does that seem unfair to anyone else? Sometimes, I hate being a man.

SU: Student President James Franco and Student VP Angie Pati announced that Euclid Shuttle services will kick off this semester. It will “provide a consistent, convenient, and safe way to travel for students.”

Has anyone coined "girther" for those who belive the president weighs more than his doctor reports?

Maybe send the “Orange alert test” text before waking me up with a siren? What is this Hawaii?

A 10-day Carnival cruise in the South Pacific descended into violent anarchy wapo.st/2EBkVa0

Stand out like DrLupo with one of the new contrails! Which is your favorite? clips.twitch.tv/DeterminedEnde…

I’m surprised the NRA was affiliated with car rental companies at all, considering Hertz and Avis enforce tyrannical rules like "age restrictions" and "having a license."

And the douche of the year award goes to Scott Rogowsky