アップルパイ！

"...Texas, where do you think the REST of my money goes?"

"No, I'm saying that I immediately spent that money on a date. I didn't *save* it!"

"Then it's going to take me twice as long to pay you back~"

"You know what? Lemme check something real quick." She flashes a grin, pulls out her phone, and fires off a few texts in rapid succession, then holds up a finger to motion Texas to wait. With a few dings, she gets her responses. "Deal."

"See, all that tells me is the borrow from my tertiary sources instead. You wanna know the trick that really makes me faster than you, Texas? It's knowing that I always have to be more than one step ahead."

"If I was as predictable as you think I'd just have made an excuse to not pay you at all instead of making you... hold on, let me just check real quick..." She pulls out her phone again, glances at it, and puts it back in her pocket. "...fifteen minutes late for your shift."

"Ah well, too much ice cream distracts from the pie. That explains why she was the only one who didn't respond."

//Oh no vorny

POURS CEREAL, MILK, AND A RAW EGG INTO A BLENDER. HITS PUREE. DRINKS IT RIGHT OUT OF THE CONTAINER.

//horny? horny

"Penis boob."

//are people seriously doing the 50 line "please look at me!" tweets in 2023? can't we leave that shit in 2013 where it belongs

"I know it's inconvenient, but you need to fill out a paper invoice. Computers are a liability and besides, that's not why I'm here, is it?" Code name: Redacted Class: Medic Operator file: dreadetc.carrd.co

"PC load letter? What the fuck does that mean?"