I Am A: -man -woman ✅entity beyond your comprehension Seeking: -men -women ✅the ability to remove sentience

I don't feel so gucci Mr Strongfork

*stands at the edge of your bed taking huge bites out of a kitkat*

*rollerblades into Rhys's office with sunglasses and a piña colada* Rhys, you're not gonna fuckin believe this

Todays Agenda: screaming into the abyss (2 snack breaks)

do you ever want to stockpile your own blood over the course of a few years and then just go around and start spreading it everywhere before mysteriously disappearing, leaving suspicious amounts of blood throughout sanctuary and turning the whole town into a crime scene

Me, brick, and Mordecai when Mordecai got infected by spores

"This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn Roland's bbq grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit

bring me your dead pet and i will make a sword out of it for $39

moxxi: watcha up to? ;) me: aiming my sniper rifle at adam sandlers head

me: babe i promise i wont do weeb shit at this party me 3 drinks in and someone looks at me wrong:

mailman: *tries to put mail through my doors mail slot* me: *shoves my sword through and goes for the knees*

Am I boy? Am I a girl? It doesn't matter. I'm going to burn your house down

I have a disease where if I hear the name "H*ndsome J*ck", I vomit instantly

you thought it was zer0, but it was me, katagawa!

sticks and stones may break my bones but i could kill your whole family

hey zer0 you suckin’ on my ex’s toes? how my booty taste