I feel superior when I’m able to grab that one piece of hair that’s tickling me from the inside of my shirt on the first try

Wordle is addicting, but also so frustrating

If Ryan Reynolds wants to put out a new movie every month for the rest of my life… I’d be MORE than okay with that

The way you pronounce island: iland The was I pronounce it in my head: eyes land

SORRY TMI!!! But every so often I put a tampon in, I somehow fuck it up. You’d think after 8 years of having my period I’d be able to do it correctly🥲🥴

I just wanna be a wife

I’m obsessed with watching this Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial

I am quite curious as to how the jury is going to rule on the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial

Until you get comfortable with being alone you’ll never know if you’re choosing someone out of love or loneliness

It bothers me you don’t spell lose as choose

How to eat frozen uncrustables. 1. Peel off edges 2. Take a small bite to start opening 3. Pull apart and eat in halves

I was today years old when I realized that you don’t need to have a three pronged outlet even if you have a three pronged plug🥲

Big fear of mine is going to crack open an egg and it’s just a baby chick inside

I think it’s hilarious when people post photos from a wedding saying “congratulations so and so on your wedding day”, but only post photos of themselves and/or with significant others and none with the bride and groom😂

I’m fucking sad man

Guess who is unFUCKING well!! It’s me. I am unfucking well.

My gyno billed me for having QUESTIONS about my vagina. Are you fucking kidding me?

I told my friend that I work everyday which means I don’t have days off; and he said: “yeah we don’t get days off, but we have hours off.” And I just don’t know if that made me feel better or worse

I’m gonna give 10 random people that repost this and follow me $25,000 for fun (the $250,000 my X video made) I’ll pick the winners in 72 hours