Here’s the press breaking social distancing rules to report on Dominic Cummings breaking social distancing rules 😂 I ain’t watching the news anymore it’s a bunch of twats reporting on a bunch of twats, so if they open the pubs let me know!

Why are all the spideys coming indoors I can't cope 😭

Grief, I’ve learnt, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, & in the hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.

Your phone when you say you want to buy something

Cabinet minister Therese Coffey replied to @Marcusrashford's appeal saying 'water cannot be disconnected though.' Piers Morgan and Susanna Reid discuss her 'tone deaf' response to Rashford's heartfelt plea. Today is the 49th day of the government's boycott of GMB.

Working in a client facing role makes you despise poor customer service even more 😤 Virgin Media ❤️ are the absolute worst

my sister got her a-level results today! Her mock results were AAA, her centre assessed results were A*,A,A* which she 100% deserves yet because of clever Boris’ algorithm she’s ended up with BBC ... HOW do you come to that result when NONE of her work has ever been graded that

Brain: I see you’re trying to sleep, let me offer you a selection of your worst memories from the last 10 years..

THIS IS NOT A FINANCE ACCOUNT. I DO NOT HAVE ANY TRADING ADVICE. HEDGES-STOCKS IS MY SURNAME.

Turns out Jes Rose is a vile racist 🤮🤮 #jesrose

There is a special place in hell for those two.

Trying to pinpoint Liam Payne's new accent

𝐅𝐔𝐋𝐋-𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐄𝐓: South Shields 1-1 Warrington Town Penalties up next. 📸 Kev Wilson Photography #SSFC #WeGrowTogether

1/22 GLOBAL EXCLUSIVE: Prime Minister Boris Johnson misled the public about the severity of his Covid-19 condition. Now that we have all had a chance to process #Partygate it is time to reveal what I'm calling #Deathgate. A multimedia THREAD from Stop Lying In Politics Ltd:

For anyone trying to get #peterkay Peter Kay tickets: gigsandtours.com/tour/peter-kay

You can turn the pic B&W but they’re still Sunderland fans 🙄🤬😂#safc