If you don’t play the wires on your trailer door like a bass guitar then were you even in a band??

Water bottle in the back pocket of my khaki shorts ready to rock

Looking for work? Located in Orlando? Let me know! I have opportunities available.

no moon at all

My dawg fresh what about you

imma tell my kids this was pompey

Ur gonna make me blushhh

😌😌 music.apple.com/us/album/bad-y…

doom buggy

super into this new @yelyahwilliams stuff

how was last night in the bosom of luxury?

Dr. Edamame

Alexa play diesel engine idling playlist on Spotify

yeah i have a kia soul but i drive it like a tesla.. no hands 😏

Bumper stickers are wild like what made you think I needed to know about your neutered cat at this intersection

Don’t text me I’m on whiskey

Uh oh I feel a Billy Joel addiction coming on

When the waiter asked this older gentleman “how was your meal?” He replied proudly with “well, I went through that thing like a chainsaw so I would say it was pretty darn good”

You gotta shake the tambourine or it will shake you

destroy the dance floor literally