Fancy a cheap laugh? Come and watch me attempt to bartend at Casita bar on Friday.

Aged Negronis at The Rose in London Bridge. Not half bad!

Fancy winning our 10 favourite bottles of gin? That's ALL TEN BOTTLES BABY! Get involved! bit.ly/1Gsy6TB

A cheeky nip of Burrough's Reserve at the top of Ben Nevis.

Gin sausages? Only at @pedlerpeckham... bit.ly/1IGVp9l

Happy Martini Day, bitches!

What would Jesus do? Officiate a gay marriage. And then cater it using only a loaf and a fish.

Russian visa application. Like a colonoscopy but without the intimacy.

Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to Beefeater MIXLDN Estonia we go.

Off to Kazan for #MIXLDN Russia. (Nope, I've no idea where it is either.)

𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 CHILDREN. If you don't get what you want and holding your breath doesn't work, initiate a constitutional review.

Drop me an email at [email protected]

Today I learnt that there's a sport called fistball and Germany are world champs. In other news, the #beefeatermixldn finals start today.

Government initiative encouraging middle-aged to keep healthy into their 70s announced week after possible rise in pension age. Coincidence?

Alps avec mon velo, booked. Up up and up with @gingerbitters Tim Stones #ba 🗻+🚴+🍺

History of Europe: War War War War War War War Arguments about bananas. To be honest, I'll probably go with banana arguments. #remain

This fuckin' knuckle dragger does not speak for me. I don't live in London at the moment, but I sure as shit... fb.me/1fKlkF6vt

WHO'S THE REAL BEEYATCH BEHIND REMATCH? Find out here: bit.ly/2ddozZ4 Tales of the Cocktail Tim Stones #cocktailcredentials #rematchbeeyatch

@ginwithlove In intrigued by your product. Where can I find more info? There's not much on your site about specific botanicals/production.