In newsrooms across London, well paid propagandists are scrambling to find stories to take #NHSCrisis off front page. Watch this space...

Trust us, 48 hours of striking is much better than the utter chaos that will ensue if these cuts go ahead. #TubeStrike

Are the Tories watching Hospital? No! They are busy getting paid by lobbyists & taking out shares in private healthcare #hospital #saveNHS

At least I'm not the only one with a stiffy in here... #ThingsNeverToSayAtAFuneral

Open the shirt Kuato lives #ThingsNeverToSayAtAFuneral

That necklace is technically mine and I don't want it all muddy #ThingsNeverToSayAtAFuneral

If Arsenal finish 4th we'll look forward to mediocrity & a squad favouring capitulation when it matter most. We need change. #bbcfootball

Liverpool to win in the 93rd minute with a scrambled goal scored by a substitute. You heard it here first. #bbcfootball

We'll talk about temping fate. They score the minute I tweet

Arsenal now look forward to their FA cup drumming & another season of capitulation under Wenger. Yawn. Watching Groundhog Day #bbcfootball

You know when you wipe your arse then check each tissue? That's the same as reading The Sun or Daily Mail. Minus the spend. #mediabias

If you're watching BGT you're missing Jeremy Corbyn talking sense on channel 4. Watch something that matters. #BGT

Theresa May protest track, Liar Liar GE2017, number four on Official Singles Chart bbc.in/2qITiAO

Seems a lot of folk like the idea of nuclear war. Can't see the positives, personally.

Outrageous x.com/CaptainSKA/sta…

#GE2107 #WeakAndWobbly #mediabiasdidnotkillcorbyn

Awkward. Car crash. Tacky. Dreadful date locations. So awful I can't stop watching it. Is it a satire on how bad TV has got? #BlindDate

Arsenal deteriorating at a steady rate, we'll be 16th in the 2018/19 season. Arsene;finger not on pulse. #bbcfootball

Worst performance on XFactor is Cheryl's sperm donor chap. Liam painful. #XFactor #trodonacatstail

Looking forward to the dignity of Arsenal finishing a very respectable 6th this season. Well worth the most expensive season tickets in the league. #bbcfootball