I'm balls deep in his Mrs. What he gets for drowning. Silly cunt. #mooned

Bow down to king Alfie Moon.

Evenin folks. I'm off to take a massive shite on Nish Panesar's doorstep. Hope the cunt steps in it. #mooned

My Kathleen will be back in my arms (and my bed) before you know it. I love my Kathleen. #mooned

Which of these dickheads should I punch first?

Happy valentine's day folks. I asked my Kathleen if I could stick a bunch of roses up her arse to celebrate the occasion. She declined. Rude bitch. #mooned

Happy birthday Eastenders I love my Kathleen. #EastEnders

I’ve got it. I’ll be using it on Nish Panesar next time he gets his filthy claws in my Kathleen. #Mooned

Lives were changed

What killed Keanu?

I’ll fish it out for her… with me teeth. #mooned

Pinch, punch, first of the month… Who’ll be first to receive a mighty Moon right hook?

Can’t wait to be finger blasting my Kathleen again soon. #eastenders #didyoumissme

Alfie Moon Karen Taylor Angie Watts Never thought I’d say this but you got that right Alfie Moon!

Love seeing Nish Panesar squirm. The sooner he dies the better. #mooned

Good evening wankers. The twins drank a pint of piss tonight before they went to bed. Tommy told them it was orange juice, dirty little fucker. #mooned

don’t make me laugh!! People avoid you in the street. Can’t say I blame them really 🤷🏻‍♂️

I love my Kathleen

The best minute mart manager walford will ever see, a million times better than that Nish prick. #eastenders

Hello you colossal shit stains. I’m back… My kids are being cunts and Zoe’s on ‘er way back to the square, might go jump off the roof of the vic 🙄