My top 5 all time greatest movie genres: 1. John Cusack getting rained on 2. Nicholas Cage screaming at kids 3. Bourne anything 4. Anything animated where the dad has shoulders and a strong jawline 5. Cillian Murphy #Hifidelity #topfive

Spammer:….. Me: so? Wtf you wanna try me right now? Spammer: Why you cussin’ already? Me: i dunno mama, you called me! Spammer:…*click*

I’m gunna write a multi-cam sitcom where it’s a bunch of gay people sit around and talk about how weird heteros are. The slang will obviously be “karen” and “chad”.

That old man that does spill/drop painting drives me absolutely insane. All i ever see is hundreds of dollars falling on the fucking floor. Like, have some fucking respect for real artists that can’t afford your level of frivolity.

How come the difference between 3% phone brightness and 0% phone brightness is 1000%?

RFK Jr. is more pointless than a president with no actual head.

They are beyond reason and scolding and getting smacked on the hand. People like rhonda santis need to get the ever living piss beat the fuck out of them. They are living off our dollar and it needs to fucking stop.

Ever do that thing where you scratch your hand before working with citrus for 8 hrs.? 🙄

I sincerely hope it’s not lost on anyone that 99% of my Uber drivers are Teslas.

If Trump lied about his weight, and they’re going to document it when he get’s booked, that’s just an additional charge of perjury, right?

This you?

Weird how quickly my Verizon service started working after i had word with their bot chat.

Media: …but what drives Elon? His Followers: Build. The. PAY. Wall

Ahh, Elon’s Twitter. Where fragile, white, man-boys compare getting called “dear” or “sweetheart” to getting called the n-word. The mere audacity is laughable.

End Racial Discrimination at Babcock High School - Sign the Petition! chng.it/N2w48dhH via Change.org This story is fucking disgusting. Florida is a racist trashhole.

The reason why Ryan Murphy is trash is because he started with a “great concept with untouchable actors”, and devolved into “shitty concepts with terrible actors, but at least theyre constantly in the news.”

Maye Musk Elon Musk President Donald J. Trump After 50 it's a bit cringey to have your mommy telling the world what a good boy you've been.

You can tell J.K. Rowling is on the bad side of herstory bc Elon Musk is like super letting her “i’m an old lady” thing happen in real time.