It’s not just nachos

To be clearer: your app data is not private. if your menstruation pattern is disrupted, and an app knows about it, prosecutors can use that as evidence against you in court

Supreme Court my ass

Taking the dog on a walk and telling anyone she barks at to please not take it personally because she’s just pissed off about roe v wade

When I text you 💦🥩 it means meet me at Truffani’s.

This cat is an ancient wizard

one of the best parts of a relationship is hanging out on the bed together

i only care abt stuff like this from now on

My boss just gave me a "quiet promotion": I have many more responsibilities but my job title and pay stayed the same

Me: I’m a guy 😤 Me when the woman’s bathroom has a shorter line: 🎀👙💄🥺

A coffee mug that says “don’t talk to me until I’ve had my daily listen of the 1999 nu-metal butt rock anthem ‘Break Stuff’ by Limp Bizkit”

—Interviewer: Do you have any special skill that can benefit our company? Me: x.com/Solocuriosos_1…

Oh god oh fuck it’s the gaba-ghoul

why does anyone buy shitty toilet paper? you can easily steal that from any public bathroom

We just aren’t the same 😒

Velociraptors could have been domesticated