Guess I’ll be leaning on my ambidextrous skills this week and gaslighting myself into being left handed for a few days. I’m a great cook but could never be a chef the way I’m always injuring myself in the kitchen.

Mix that silver and gold jewellery Don’t be scared

ITS TIME BOYS LETS GET THIS ⭐️💙🏈

I swear the bar near me keeps making their hot wings spicier every time I come here. They’re testing me. I’m starting to question my spice tolerance. I love it.

Where the fuuuuck is the hate for HIM coming from?? Good acting. (predictable but) Fun and relevant story. Sweaty beautiful men. Ritualistic titties if that’s more your thing. Blood. Visually just absolutely stunning. What else do you people want!?

I know times are hard but it’s just sad that the Arizona Cardinals can’t afford to wash their dirty uniforms

Fellow found footage freaks take note that Tubi is where it’s at rn just a treasure trove of weird good shit

Do we think jalapeño plants grow spicier peppers when you aggressively shit talk the plant or gently encourage them to grow big and spicy??

The amount of popcorn I’m able to down at the movies is disgustingly impressive

“Topps Finest” trading card sets but it’s all of the -finest- athletes

This might be the first time that none of my last 4 includes a horror movie. Proud and appalled at the same time.

Any margarita can be a spicy margarita when you carry hot sauce in your purse

“You must be going to see SCREAM” omg how did you know

How do I become a ceviche influencer??

I’m such a girls girl

Just played peekaboo with a crab in a tide pool so y’all can call me Ariel now

Told myself I was gonna be an adult and switch to regular pill daily vitamins instead of gummies but now I always forget to take them

“Of course honky tonk cowboys still do blow, have you been to a rodeo?”

The dirty version of the Baja Blast is better than the plain original.

forget about touching grass, i need to touch THE SEA I NEED TO GO INTO THE WATER I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!