an abridged version of Daniel Mallory Ortberg's WHY ARE YOU LONELY: A TEXT GAME

"Yeah cause I have a lot of friends that are short kings and they want to kill themselves."

Me whenever I'd play magic in any sort of tournament setting:

Don’t speak poorly of yourself, even as as a joke. It’s not funny, relatable, or “cute” It’s destructive.

There will always be suffering. But we must not suffer over the suffering.

you can also just be miserable. like one of the great misery-relief valves is realizing you can be miserable without beating yourself up about being miserable which just compounds the misery

"What do you MEAN that my conscientiousness is at the 9th percentile?!"

"I do intend on you leaving a mark on my life but not like that..."

"I was cute until 9/11 happened."

Today was a good day.

Do the exact opposite of what normies using Claude/Chatgpt for therapy are doing. Text your friends asking easily googleable questions. Impose on your loved ones. Send a neurotic voice memo to your sister. Don’t let them take this from you

rest in peace Mr. Lynch 🤍

Patient: Everything is hopeless Fake therapist #1: Things will get better Fake therapist #2: Let’s work on acceptance Fake therapist #3: Let’s practice breathing Fake therapist #4: Here’s a hopelessness worksheet Fake therapist #5: Read this book Fake therapist #6: That’s a

If you're so smart, why aren't you Happy

The most direct path to a fulfilling career is not to follow your passion. It's to follow your flow. Flow is the state of full absorption. When you're in the zone, you don't even notice that you're enjoying it. Intrinsic motivation lies in the activities where time disappears.

most feelings are not known most knowledge is not thought

In high school, I was complaining about how long the school day was and my teacher turned to me and said, "the days are long, but the years are short" and I was like "what the fuck are you talking about you lunatic" and then the bell rang and now I'm in my 30s.

"Babe, it's a Monday."

Ah! You see, this miserable little document, this so-called date-me doc, is our era’s most honest pornography. It pretends to be romance, but what is it really? It is no longer the trembling hand on paper, the confession of desire. It is a spreadsheet of desire. “I am ready. I am

Labels and categories are useful shortcuts but if you ever want to truly understand something or someone you have to experience them not categorise them.