'Penguin' is 1976% easier to say than 'Benedict Cumberbatch'.

The career span of a British X Factor winner is 2.9 minutes.

Took a nap, finished some needlework, and worked on a puzzle....so if you ever want to know what it feels like to be 80 call me #oldsoul

@leanbeanwakim grandmas unite! :)

"Allll the right junk in allllll the right places." - me after cleaning my room

Church people and family be like: "I saw you standing next to a boy. Are you guys getting married?" #mercy

Happy Reformation Day

2 in 4 musically trained Britons play the crumpet.

Prayer gives us relief from the melancholy burden of self-absorption.

If you think about it, Sam Smith's "Latch" is more theologically sound than Carrie Underwood's "Something in the Water."

When your download says this..... #mercy

It's my yearly week of prayer and fasting. Aka car inspection week. #wegotthis #onemoreyear #fingerscrossed

Sometimes I feel like my life is going great ... and then I eat jellybeans and sandwich meat for lunch and I'm not so sure #poorchoices

That moment you write the sentence: "I look forward to our continued correspondence." And think, "who have I become?" #worklife #vocab

Reason #782 that I know there is a God: my car just passed emissions. #praisebreak

My adult life basically consists of writing appropriately worded emails. #adultness

1. Drive ice cream truck 2. Wait for kids to run out 3. Never stop 4. Kids keep running 5. Cure childhood obesity

For me traveling is basically a 24 game of hide and seek with my passport #amillionminipanicattacks

By craving to be more, man becomes less. Start making plans for abundance.

Just sitting here bawling my eyes out while watching Doctor Who. #fridaynightturnup