Men will be like, “women just aren’t good leaders,” and then call their wives 9 times from the grocery store because they can’t find the items on the list *she* made. But sure, women can’t handle leadership.

neither “chickpea” nor “garbanzo bean” really capture what those things are all about

the block button really does speak to me like the cursed amulet sometimes. thousands have been slain for minor acts of treason. all for the glory of my kingdom of course

spring you absolute freak welcome back

I don’t CARE if a protagonist in a romcom has an unrealistically expensive apartment! That’s the point! Who CARES if she sells sea shells by the sea shore and walks back up the beach to her $3.5M beachfront property—suspend your disbelief bitch!

what bothers me most about good weather in nyc is the pressure to have to seize the day lol sun leave me alone

not all angels are in heaven. for example im in my bed taking a nap Snore mi mi mi

writing an e-mail and getting a prompt from AI "this sentence could be more concise" no. i am verbose. i am loquacious. i am long-winded and often redundant even. you machine, do not tell me how to form my words

Eric Adams is finally gonna fulfill his destiny: opening a pizza shop in the Bronx

any white person saying ghetto always feels racially charged i’m sorry

Do British people still do the accent when nobody's around

Reading on grass is probably the activity with the biggest spread between how nice you imagine it to be and how nice it actually is

how life feels when nobody knows where you are or what you're up to

Stanley Tucci’s Elegant Heterosexuality

There is demonic presence in Walmart at all times

Your chances of being able bodied your entire life are slim to none. It is always in your best interest to advocate for a more accessible world.