My Uber has the heat on blast at 80°. But my people-pleasing-trying-not-to-be-a-burden side won’t let me tell him to turn it down.

Someone remind my 4yo all the cool kids sleep in during snow days and not wake up at 4am.

beyoncé at lost lands

A guy at the gym told me I had an “edge” bc of “all of the tattoos” on my back. I only have 3 tattoos on my back. Then I realized he was referring to the red circle bruises I got from cupping. Sir, I wish I was edgy… I’m just old & crippled 😭

There really are people out here just living their lives thinking they’re good people when they’re actually a piece of shit person. Crazy.

Kinda crazy that I have an almost 5yo that I can have a full conversation with, when about a year ago he couldn’t formulate 3+ words sentences.

PSA: if you’re going to go to a show/performance, please, shut the f*ck up. People aren’t there to hear you talk to your bro/gf about your day/drama. WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE?!

If y’all wanna know the drastic difference in generations: my soon-to-be 5yo FaceTimed me as he was getting ready to take a bath. To ask me where his body wash was.

Just another day waking up in a bougie third world country with a “bipartisan” “democratic” government.

I’ve never been more salty about a replacement for an artist. I should have gone to Coachella this year 😭