When people ask what a collapse of the NHS would look like, it's this, it's already here. It's not going to be bricked up hospitals and no one answering 999, it's going to be lowering standards and rationing care. Acknowledging we can no longer help everyone who calls.

“Do you work in business?" "No, I'm homeless. I'm a homeless person." Excruciating.

My children are getting older and I realised last night that this might the last year I get Father Christmas by Raymond Briggs requested as a bedtime book. So I thought I'd do a thread in appreciation of its genius.

Excellent thread

Hot buttered toast after a night out always makes me think of you Clare When we used to go back to yours after a night at the black bull …

Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary

You really have to like things on Instagram at your peril now. Hover too long over a reel in your feed and you get served up all manner of shit.

A final thought: however difficult the last few days have been, it simply doesn’t compare to having to flee your home from persecution or war to seek refuge in a land far away. It’s heartwarming to have seen the empathy towards their plight from so many of you. 3/4

Please retweet this many, many, many times. It's horrific. Marina Hyde is so right. Why isn't this is a huge scandal? Hundreds of lives ruined. Not a single person held to account. And still: silence on the Post Office scandal | Marina Hyde theguardian.com/commentisfree/…

My column about the mushrooming This Morning fiasco, as heroism's Eamonn Holmes and Nadine Dorries enter the fray theguardian.com/commentisfree/…

On way home from our Jet2tweets holiday to Tenerife, which was amazing (and jet 2 were fabulous). Only downside, there were no toy planes left for him to buy on the way home (he managed to get one on the way out). How can we buy one when we are not on the plane? Thanks!

My newspaper column on returning newspaper columnist Boris Johnson, and the judgment (or otherwise) of Conservative MPs theguardian.com/commentisfree/…

just before anyone starts asking why women are only accusing russell brand now... last month a spanish footballer was assaulted on live tv in front of millions and there are still people defending the man in that instance. so that's why

Thanks to EarlhamprimaryschoolN22 and Lunchtime Company for my (ahem, second) lunch today! Great to sample what my son has for lunch every day.

The idea that a woman’s worth is only valued by how much a man will “shag” her. Misogyny again, as always we can rely on the likes of Laurence fox, Dan Wootton and gb news to come up with such crap.

Nearly a year ago that my retina detached, so agree that any little changes in your eye (in my case loads of new floaters) need to be checked. Thanks to Moorfields Eye Hospital NHS Foundation Trust I was operated on within 24 hours of diagnosis. Thanks to Lucy Owen and BBC Morning Live for raising awareness

My son loved the world book day celebrations, including hearing a broadcast by Michael Rosen 💙💙🎓🎓 NICE 爷爷 - thanks EarlhamprimaryschoolN22 for another great celebration of reading and books!

How cool, although clearly wasted on that audience 😂

I just nominated THE DYLAN STRONG FOUNDATION health.movementforgood.com/index.php?cn=1…