When your gf gets mad at you for getting your drone caught in her hair 2 hours after she bought it for you 🤔 I flew the thing two times obviously I’m gonna try a sick 720 flip over your head Hilary my god calm down you only lost like 3” of hair

When you say good morning beautiful and she says cute things like “seriously pls stop” and “I’ve called the police” Hahahaha bae always playin

#NewProfilePic

Can’t wait till this Corona Virus thingy goes away so I can go back to never washing my hands

Damn girl you from out of this world? Cause you have a big head like an alien.

Hilary calls- “Hey where are you?” Me-“Oh I’m at a local fundraiser that’s raising money to support young girls going to college.” Hilary-“So you’re at the top hat then.” Me-“I am at the top hat correct.”

We have a Tesla flying around our solar system but nobody can fix these god damn automatic toilets? Flushes 8 times before ya sit down I don’t even know if I honestly peed my pants or they’re just soaked at this point

Two #Champs in two weeks great job! Luc Neufeld Hard Knocks Fighting and Cody Jerome Fightforce #MMA #MuayThai #PFApride

I miss being 16 cause ppl would just laugh if you puked on yourself now everyone keep talking about AA n shit and mom keeps crying

Summons spirit on Ouija board. Me: what is your name? Ghost: I.have.a.boy.friend. 😐

Just watched Hilary tie her gym shoes by making two bunny ears like 5 year olds so I'm single now

Have FUN while getting into the best shape of your life! Join today and get an early start and pay nothing more! #BenefitsofFightCamp

Too bad you are an absolute liability at beer pong. Almost the whole package #smh #🙅‍♂️@HildaddyM x.com/angelalala4/st…

HEY YOU GUYS!!! Tarren Gallamore

Quit playin call of duty cause apparently everyone on there did stuff with my mom and that hurts

Sun can black out on a Monday but I can't?

Bugs me when people say "good boy" or "good girl" to their pets. Like oh you can just read it's mind then and know what it identifies as or

GSP: #1 all time. Tonight confirms it. Done deal. Bow down.

The cross tattoo on my shoulder is a DAILY reminder to never ever trust yourself to make serious decisions in high school. Did the ladies love it though? 😉 absolutely not. At all.

I feel like if I fist fought one of the girls that works at Tommy Guns for fuckin my head up the 43rd time that the cops would let me off cause they probably have been through the same travesty