Love watching all of RFK Jr.’s followers pretending like he isn’t one of the biggest political frauds of all time.

Fig Newtons were one of the grossest parts of the 1900s. If you ever meet somebody who says they love them, the only correct response is “you are gross”. And I don’t care if they still exist in 2024… to me they are thankfully extinct.

Clapping for the army - Rick Ingraham See Rick in The Original Room at The Store: showclix.com/event/original… 🎟️

The TV commercial for Los Angeles Chargers football tickets includes extended shots of Travis Kelce and other “away” team star players because they know using the Chargers to sell the Chargers, never sell tickets to watch the Chargers.

Got a show at The Comedy Store and a show at Laugh Factory tonight. Come on out and don’t dress up like an asshole. You’re god damn adults!

I want everyone to know, that no matter what happens with this election, I still think of most of you as brazenly foolish as individuals and strinkingly dangerous a collective groups of fools.

This picture looks like an ad for the “Reverend Rick and the Faithfully Faithless Comedy Revival”. Come check it out tonight.

Come laugh tonight. Bring that problematic uncle.

The murder of a health care company CEO is the most unifying event since those rich idiots died trying to see the titanic.

If Putin really wants to show how powerful he is, he should draft Russia's newest citizens, Assad and the male members of his family, into the Russian military... so they can show their appreciation and loyalty.

Stop calling it “the Great LA Fire”. This is LA… just accept that it’s going to be called “the World Famous” LA Fires.

I’m for whatever version of America can promise me at least 3 Nic Cage B-Movies a year, plus 1 surprisingly entertaining Nic Cage “film” at least every other year.

Every time I hear comics complaining about comics doing crowd work, I think they’re being lame until I watch a clip of the comic they were complaining about doing crowd work… and it’s always so bad it makes ME not want to do crowd work. LESSON: always listen to the shit-talkers.

The drive thru at Taco Bell used AI tonight and it was a considerably worse experience than if they had a non-English speaking human. And the robot still had the nerve to ask me to donate money for schools…

Boston bachelor party? I’ll pass. #StandUpComedy #ComedyNight #LiveComedy #Boston #ParkedMyCarInTheHarvardYard

Shitty jobs #StandUpComedy #ComedyNight #LiveComedy #Berkeley #Privilege

White, but not bright. #StandUpComedy #ComedyNight #LiveComedy #White #Jokes

Nurses, working hard? #StandUpComedy #ComedyNight #LiveComedy #Nurse #Doc

They just won the Stanley Cup so had to knock them down a peg #StandUpComedy #ComedyNight #LiveComedy #FloridaMan #Gators

It really feels like the Dodgers have become the Big Ern McCracken of Major League Baseball… and I’m excited to be in LA to enjoy it. #Dodgers #WorldSeries