My top three footballers whose surnames are also orders:

Lookman

Chilwell

Drinkwater

Wallchart ready 👀
Three weeks till kickoff ⚽️
Money to a good cause 🏥

I used to have a Brother scanner/printer that looked like that

I hate myself for saying this... but this would be an amazing third shirt. A proper throwback to the nineties days of 'the fans will buy any replica shirt we put out, so can we come up a design that stops that?'

What’s stopping you Luton Town FC ???

Has anyone ever actually woven a Sigourney?

My standup show for slightly more grown-up people is up on the Edinburgh fringe website now. I’m back at The Pear Tree 3:45pm every day 1-25th August - no need for tickets first come first served!

On the Mic: Origin Stories podcast with .Olaf Falafel
'I'm hoping to create a poo based version of battleships. Now I've said that on your podcast it will force me to actually do it.' Listen on Spotify, Apple Tunes and wherever you get your podcasts. #Comedy
onthemic.co.uk/audio_intervie…

Actors who can cure my lisp?
I'm pretty sure Anne Hathaway but I'm going to ask Colin Firth.

Actors who can cure my lisp?
I'm pretty sure Anne Hathaway but I'm going to ask Colin Firth.

Links to my upcoming shows in places like Chesham, Luton, Brighton, Bicester, Tring and Edinburgh here: campsite.bio/ofalafel

People of Chesham, I’ve been so busy banging on about my kids show that I’ve forgotten to plug the grown up show I’m also doing later that day (May 27th) tickets for both here: campsite.bio/ofalafel

Every day’s a school day

This will be fun. Book it Barnes people!!!

🤔Looking for a kids' event that combines art AND farts? Well look no further! Olaf Falafel is on his way to the UK's biggest kids' books party on Sunday 23 June. BOOK IT! BOOK IT NOW! barneskidslitfest.org/whats-on/

Kids comedy a fortnight today in Luton - one show is ‘Selling Fast’ the other show is ‘Book Now’ - see you there!

culturetrust.com/whats-on/olaf-…

Luton kit for 24/25 season leaked in the window of Next

My desire to spontaneously sing The Lion Sleeps Tonight is always just a whim away.

How a Brummie asks for a prawn cocktail flavour crisp