No wonder my relationships never last

NOBODY FOLLOW MY BLUE CHECK MARK, TED TALK GIVING, WIKIPEDIA PAGE HAVING WIFE! PLEASE FOLLOW HER!

Unlike me, Tesla's Optimus can fold a shirt without needing to use an erect penis.

I just hope he isn't a method actor. 😬

Being a boy is wanting to send someone a picture of what you did to a toilet, being a man is knowing who that someone is 💘

NYC > EVERYWHERE ELSE > NJ

They begging you to come fart on them.

Does Elon read every tweet with the word "Elon" in it?

With the NWS issuing a Severe Thunderstorm Watch for New York City, it’s possible a Warning may also be issued. Know the difference between a Watch and a Warning: