Happy St George’s Day!🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿
And today let us truly celebrate all that is English and we are proud of:
Brexit
Wetherspoons
GB News
Rwanda
Jenny Agutter
Rule Britannia
Gesture Eggs
Cars
Grindr
Tractors
Boners
Marzipan Dildos
Fleas
Les Dennis
PopCon
Lube
Stacking Dishwashers
Clams
🥳

The Channel 4 General Election team as I see it:
A-No idea who she is but looks like a jeggings wearer
B-Rod Stewart, Marxist pop singer
C-Krishnan Guru-Murthy, Bloody useless at Tango
D- Emily Maitlis, Moth.
E-Alastair Campbell, blatantly too moist
F-Claire Building, Cavapoo.
😡

HOW DARE Chris Packham the environmental Vorderist react like this!😡
Matt saved millions of lives
He gave up the chance of being PM for love
He’s a proven SAS soldier too.
His moisture,
His conkers,
His sputum,
His stiffened Wragg
Is loved by so many.❤️

Rob Roberts
Julian Knight
Imran Khan
Dave Warburton
Neil Parish
Chris Pincher
Peter Bone
Crispin Blunt
William Wragg
Mark Menzies
All Tory MPs caught up in sex scandals.
🍆
Yes, one could say ‘A Tory wall of shame’
But ONLY ONE wall.
Not TWO WHOLE HOUSES like Angela Rayner!
😡😤

Felt so sorry for Tory MP David Davies on #bbcqt last night:
Bullied by Marxist Fiona Bruce
Sneered at by Labour’s Bridget Phillipson (Good friend of Angela Rayner😡)
Jeered at by a Northern Linekerist audience.
David was both brave & dignified
Bravo sir👏

Surely we must start REGULATING these online dating sites instead of blaming its victims.
My❤️goes out to MPs Mark Menzies & William Wragg who have had to use these sites & suffered enormously.
Something HAS to be done before even more innocent Tory MPs lose their careers!
😡

Laura Trott makes it REALLY CLEAR to Marxists Fred Balls & Susanna Reid:
The lower rate of Inflation means prices are coming down even though they are in fact still going up.
This means your food costs less even though the price of it is still increasing✅

To those who say Liz Truss is unhinged, I URGE you to watch this clip of her finest moments.
It proves Liz is moist, pert & free of fleas.
She has all the qualities to lead our party again.
Ignore the deep state
Ignore our deceased Queen
Liz is our girl!❤️

I thought Rod Stewart was a Linekerist.
I thought his songs like ‘Sailing’ ‘Maggie Kaye’ & ‘Anarchy In The UK’ were utter tosh.
But here he is speaking good common sense.
ALL employees especially young skunk smoking, jegging covered ones are BLOODY LAZY!😡

Crazed Vorderist Susanna Reid challenges Chris Matthews of United Utilities,a water company that has dumped 27,000 hours worth of untreated sewage since 2020.
Chris is calm, moist & dainty.
He stands up admirably for us shareholders.
We are the good guys🙌

My wife Bunty & I love it when Health Sec Victoria Atkins is on TV.
Take this morning.
Vicky was moist, free of fleas & pleasantly fragrant.
But she was also much more than this.
She was:
Fluent
Decisive
Articulate.
Vicky genuinely has great oral skills.
Just listen to this.
🇬🇧

Reading these extracts from Liz Truss’s upcoming autobiography I think many will now realise what an intelligent & empathetic woman she is.
She could have been our GREATEST PM but was sadly destroyed by The Queen,having to do her own hair & fleas from Boris Johnson’s bloody dog😔

My❤️goes out to Jacob Rees Mogg.
Slapped with a Marxist community note.😡
So many of you on here mocking this kind & lovely man.
Have any of you not made a tiny error,huh?
All decent Christian folk I urge you to come out on your doorstep tonight & chant Latin in support of Moggy.

Smirking BBC Vorderist Naga is firmly told off by Health Sec Victoria Atkins.
Vicky is articulate,moist & fragrant as she shows that an increased NHS waiting list of 620,000 simply needs to be put into context.
Patients rejoice knowing she is in charge!👏

When in Tufton Street I have often called Bunty, Tufty.
It’s just a slip of the tongue.
I’ve called her Horny in Hornchurch & Pussy in Catford.
It happens to us all.
I won’t say what I called her in Scunthorpe once but suffice to say she wasn’t best pleased.
LEAVE RISHI ALONE!😡

Must admit when I now visit London I tend to:
Wear a conker shield
Remove all my jewellery, moths, resins & teat rings
Sell copies of Big Issue
Pretend to be a hip yute & use words such as peng, fam & nang.
Wear no socks
Stain my trousers with jizz
Swear
Smell.
Job done! 👍

Ah how I long for the old days:
When women didn’t send dick pics.
Didn’t post filth on Mumsnet.
Didn’t own 2 houses & cheat the tax man.
Didn’t wear jeggings & do pirates or whatever it’s called.
Didn’t go to Turkey for posterior lifts and nip tucks.
😔

Let’s get this straight!😡
William Wragg was a young, innocent man looking for love & was cruelly exploited. His honesty has shown courage, spunk & bravery.
=HERO
Angela Rayner deliberately exploited the tax system. Her dishonesty has shown evil, legs, fags & treachery.
=VILLAIN