Trump is gonna be pissed when he sees this 😂

Liz Truss’ book is 302 pages.

That’s 6.5 pages for every day of her premiership

🥬

What Liz and Sunak might wear this Summer are creating widespread fear and panic for the manufacturers.

Unlike the previous generations, the Kids today are totally stressed and full of angst - someone needs to warn them of the dangers of not drinking or smoking.

Got Irvine on board with my stop the pedestrian tax campaign then.

Unlike the previous generations, the Kids today are totally stressed and full of angst - someone needs to warn them of the dangers of not drinking or smoking.

#TaxTheRich

What? I'm ripening some Mangoes you perv!

“It’s OK Scrooge, Jacob Marley’s later - I’m just your local Reform candidate”

Just before you start your day at work, it’s well worth spending the time and effort to craft a plan to incorporate your to do list within each hour – if only just to watch it all turn to shit within the first 10 minutes.

The Tory talent barrel has been scraped so much that it now leads to another barrel in Mauritius.

Picasso really went downhill in his later years.

Central Bylines Peter Stefanovic Sussex Bylines

#DailyNude

'Ok chaps, settle down - now here's the thing, it's really not the done thing to be sending pictures of the old Boris to strangers you know - very bad form.'

Just been 'harassed' at an Aldi Stores UK 🤷‍♀️

Apparently you can't walk around the store with your own bag filling it up as you go. Items must be placed 'in a basket'

A member os staff walked up to me mid aisle with a basket and said it was store policy.

I asked if it's a new policy…

Won’t be long now before someone at the checkout at Aldi is there with a torch and wearing rubber gloves asking you to bend over.

Here we go…

How fucking disgusting is the Daily Mail?

Imagine listening to two days of damning testimony against the government and the Post Office, and coming up with this headline…

The biggest threat to British democracy, is the British press.