2023 is aggressive and i fucking love it

i was today years old when i learned what a “brojob” is

i just goddamn love Dolly Parton

i miss my mom

Oh, that’s how you say “Temu.” #SBLVIII

why tf can’t we “spring forward” in the middle of monday?

My kid: “Dad will you be voting this year?” Me: “Sure, it will probably be the last time.” My kid: “So I won’t ever be able to vote?” Me: “We’ll find out on November 5th.” My kid: “That sucks, can I have ice cream?” Me: “Absolutely the fuck not.”

dogs across the US: “life is ending tonight, i love you my sweet humans.” cats across the US:

HEY YUNGINS - pissed about Netflix rn? welcome to 1993 when your parents would pick up the phone while you’re on a dial-up modem

jake paul def wins biggest swamp ass

funny

rt if you already fucked up 2025

wait, Parker Posey is back does that mean i am relevant again

just wanna be seen the way chris loves jojo

so, in other news… x got fun again

JD wanting to deport the guy who criticized his shit “fashion” is literally the gayest thing possible. we already all knew it, now he’s giving big power bottom energy. HAPPY PRIDE JD!

my kitten: i’m gon do what i what, when i want. me: ok 🥹 my older cat: dad you beat me for way less wtf

how does one know the difference between serendipity and albatross?

A store called "Forever 29" and all they sell is false hope and vodka.