Every time I eat gluten free pizza, I assume there’s a paper napkin stuck to it and I’ll keep looking for that napkin after every bite. There’s no napkin guys, that’s just pizza without gluten.

Gluten free pizza is sadness warmed up. It’s a wild Friday night guys.

Hi. It’s fall. It’s hot. Bye.👋

Gotta new movie coming out to select theaters this Friday 1/13 and streaming onto your tvs 1/17. 🍿 #NightTrain

Today is the official day you can watch NIGHT TRAIN on your very own Tv! Avail on iTunes, Amazon, Vudo and more. 📺

Helping those in need is legit why we exist. Let’s help Turkey and Syria 🙏 Baby2Baby's Disaster Relief and Emergency Response Program classy.org/campaign/c4409…

Heal Mana 🙏 gofund.me/55dc4920

Anyone else find them selves googling “what year is it?” a little too often?

We can only do what we can only do. This makes sense in my brain.

Did I just purchase not one but four mushroom lamps? Why yes. Yes I did.

Them Instagram ads got me again. Can ya blame me though? Who doesn’t love to receive gifts in the mail every few days??

I just ordered a can of spam. Is this the beginning of my midlife crisis?

That time my kid told me “at least you’re not a hooker mom.” Thanks kid thanks.

When in doubt, listen to 80’s music. You’re welcome.

Having kids means you will be forced into multiple games of hide and seek inside your ONE ROOM HOTEL ROOM. You’ve been warned.

As if I needed another reason to adore our Cobra creators Jon Hurwitz Josh Heald Hayden Schlossberg ✊#strikefirststrikehardnomercy

This is a side by side of two women gracing the front covers of two well known magazines. The one on the right we all know is Martha Stewart, age 81. The one on the left is Apo Whang-Od, age 106, a tribal tattooist in a remote province in the Philippines. There seems to be an

A simple sneeze has turned into a violent game of Russian roulette: is this gonna be the one that breaks my back or just pull a neck muscle? Your guess is as good as mine! #thisis40

I’ve been robbed of my blue check mark?! Does that even matter anymore?? Is twitter still relevant? Is this thing on? #thisis40

Real happy I took off alllll the outside furniture covers after our non stop rainy weather in LA. Real happy. (It’s raining again & I give up) 😎#rainraingoaway