CITY WATCH ALERT: His highness wants you to know that "Northerners are smelly." That is all.

CITY WATCH ALERT: King Joffrey is a slut.

CITY WATCH ALERT: Ignore that last alert. Some kid got ahold of my twitter account. I did not post that.

Παρακαλούμε να αναζητήσουν καταφύγιο σύντομα! Μια τεράστια καταιγίδα πλησιάζει την πόλη. Oh whoops, wrong alphabet. Well just ignore it.

The king wants his subjects to know that race, sexual orientation, and gender doesnt matter since you are all equally worthless in his eyes.

Okay I'm trying to follow everyone that is following me, but my mouse can't click that fast. #ifIamnotfollowingyouyetpleasedontbeoffended

CITY WATCH ALERT: 4/20 smoke weed e'rryday

CITY WATCH ALERT: Reminder for KL weed dealers: 50 golds a day keeps the City Watch away.

I'd say something witty, but I believe I already said everything I needed to on the show itself. Now excuse me while I go for a drink.

CITY WATCH ALERT: The king has decided his subjects can not turn left more than 4 times a day unless you are selling lingerie on an elephant

CITY WATCH ALERT: The king wants to know what time it is. He's too tired to look at a clock right now.

CITIZENS: the king has declared scienzoromormocathatheism shall replace the faith of the seven. No idea what it is, but either way I'm paid.

@AndreaZg21 @jonbastsnow Theon Greyjoy Yoren the Crow Sandor Clegane Hodor baby, I'm in everyone's dreams.

Stop sending me messages about how someone is "saying horrible things about me." I'm not stupid, I know what you are doing, and I'm from tv.

@Ser_Lancel Wait, aren't you banging his sister?

Why doesn't George R.R. Martin use twitter? Because he killed all 140 characters. #GameofThrones

Been a while since I've been on here. Been busy and whatnot. Heard the Freys threw one hell of a wedding last night!

Now I know last night was heart-wrenching to y'all, but that wedding was really damn good by Dothraki standards. #GameOfThrones

x.com/redweddingtears I don't get why everyone's so upset. I, the best character, am still alive. There's no need to cancel HBO.

Bronn the Sellsword The one thing wrong with this season is that it's been too Bronn-light. :)