Love to watch Magnificent Vixon battle it out on Twitter. She's much smarter than most people think they are themselves.

I threw a couple shrimp on the Barbie.

Week starts out perfectly thanks to Skeery Jones and #mrmichaeloppenheimer

@ArianaGrande America's Past time and MLB has one less problem without cha, America Hater. #MLBAllStarGame

#keepgoodgoing

@vozmarelyssala #exactly #pointtaken #genius #yourecorrect #listen #truethat #imnotdoneyet #okayimdonenow #nowimdone #nonowimdone #out

this is awesome

This is my front yard, courtesy AT&T. Now 2 pedestals, instead of 1 & not even a customer. #landscapegeniuses

Heres my neighbors directly across the street's front yard courtesy of AT&T digging the same day. They ARE customers

Hope your techs like Holly bushes, AT&T, cuz I'm going to COVER your pedestals with them.

When the Jehovah's Witness church has a gate that keeps people out yet regularly go door to door in my 'hood #ironic

Jimmy Kimmel Live Donald J. Trump I guess this isn't the way anything really played out...

B.J. Novak Ryan started the fire!

#CelebrationBowl lost due to excessive celebration. Hope the #belkbowl isn't lost due to excessive shopping.

Homecoming for the Holidays

#PatriotsDay thank you. That week was terrifying. You captured the fear we all felt.

Day 1 was packed full of fun 🎥🎉it helped me bring high energy to the cam when talking about my time SXSW with Spectrum Reach Kernel

@confswerin353 chum is dead fish that is dumped off a boat to attract bigger fish. Are you a bigger fish?

Before kickoff in the land of #ClevelandBrowns

Charlotte Hornets should rename their cheerleading squad from "Honey Bees" to "Derrière Jordan" to honor the man, myth, legend MJ The Honey Bees