when i eat more than my boyfriend

just remembered when jeggings were called pajama jeans. terrible marketing but much more honest

bringing back "in this economy?"

Fourth quarter….

Cult of Personality

“You have to escape your comfort zone bro” DO I LOOOK COMFORTABLE

i cant believe people download apps to remind themselves to drink water in the morning and try to have a good day. like damn. who lets u know u need to wipe ur ass ?

It Is STILL January. Here’s What We Know, and How You Can Help

chromosome lookin ahh

had a bone chilling nightmare and now ive been doing standup comedy in my head for an hour. this was actually the punchline at the end "and if you think this show was bad, no you dont bc i'm doing it my head after a nightmare"

Hell yeah

Dolly Parton for President. 1) southern philanthropist hits all the political marks 2) imagine the world's leaders trying to keep their eyes up

i’m not irish but i do participate in the irish goodbye and for that i will celebrate

dying at the idea of capones on st patricks day