Anything Brenda said.

when you clean your room so good that the only trash left is you:

spend a night, do weekends, but go homeee

how did people even tell pigeons where to deliver stuff man what the fuck

they stop asking you for ID once the light in your eyes is gone

she is so real. god bless her

Like let’s actually FOCUS fr

I forgot about this stupid shit but imagine if they poured $80 billion into feeding the hungry instead of this failed cartoon universe that nobody wanted

stop using ozempic and starve like a real man

Day 3 with no marijuana, I feel wonderful

why is wearing a hat as someone who doesn't usually wear hats so difficult and humiliating. it feels like everyone can tell i don't know what i'm doing

Justin Timberlake when the officer told him to walk a straight line

he actually got a chuckle out of me i’ll give it to him this timejdkdjd

this may sound extreme but I am fundamentally superior to those who watch this

They act like that at work because that’s all they have.

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with kids

i hate being responsible for my own meals because i’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day

What if I start commenting "Who asked?" under everyone's LinkedIn posts?

daydreaming about all the slutty ouftits i’m going to wear this summer