This is Jorge Vital, the Man Utd goalkeeping coach. He turns 27 next week…

We’re not a good team or squad at the moment. We know that. But most clubs in our position limp through seasons with no highs; simply trying to limit the lows. Even at our lowest ebb, United are still able to give us “Do you remember where you were when…” moments, like tonight.

⁦Maisie Adam⁩ scoring Chicken City’s first goal this afternoon.

Watching the Champions League Final and I’m starting to think that the PSG ownership model of investing in the team might be more aligned to success than the United ownership model of piling debt and interest charges on the club and taking massive annual dividends.

PSG without Di Maria are a lot more palatable as Champions League Winners.

A call for a second holocaust? Nazi-style rally? Nuremberg? Wow! That escalated quickly! Don't let it ever be said that Andrew Neil can be prone to a little bit of hyperbole...

As a tribute to Ozzy Osbourne, the band of the Coldstream guards performed "Paranoid" at changing of the guard today.

Either Chris Philp MP is too stupid to comprehend that one person was sentenced after pleading guilty, and another was found not guilty at trial by a jury of his peers, or, perhaps even worse, he is making up lies because he believes that we are all too stupid to understand.

Not very often you see that 😳 Kasper Schmeichel handles a Callum McGregor backpass, with the referee giving Kairat an indirect free-kick 💥

This is the Leader of the Opposition, a post that used to be held by mature grown-ups that could debate policies. Today? It appears to be held by representatives that are juvenile in their behaviour. I used to vote for this party when they had grown-ups at the helm.

This is 200,000 people at Glastonbury. I will leave it to others to decide who is lying on the numbers in attendance… #UniteTheKingdom

5ft 6in Yaxley-Lennon mocking someone’s height. 😂😂

I’ve contacted Crush Music requesting a meeting with Miley Cyrus and Billy Ray Cyrus to discuss C&W in the UK, institutional failures, and the attack on free music. My music is being censored more now than ever. We cannot leave this to Simon Cowell. Miley Cyrus Billy Ray Cyrus

Hey Grok, Show me someone with zero self awareness making a video that demonstrates this.

The Community Note on this Talk tweet just go to show why anyone with an iota of intellectual reasoning shouldn’t just accept, believe or retweet anything and everything they read on X. Pantomime Dames, FFS. It’s as British as Yorkshire Pudding.

“My experience inside Number 10…” 49 days in the job! She’ll have just about worked out how the coffee machine works!

I’m sure that Greenland would just love to be part of this circus.

I know a Jason Statham plot when I see one

🚨 Wayne Rooney: “In 2008, Sir Alex Ferguson refused to talk to the entire Man United team for two whole weeks after that performance. Thomas got sent off and Rio went in goal; we did everything possible to come back but nothing seemed to work for us.”

Throwing a headbutt towards another player: Yellow card. Touching someone's ponytail: Off you go.