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I felt a lil delulu wearing a packer shirt today but my husband also did and so did 2/3 of our friends that came over AND a random 13 year old kid at the grocery store (we're in VA so felt more significant)

Not to beat a dead horse but spending $8 million dollars on an ad telling people to act more like Jesus bothers me so much

Kylie Kelce at the next family get together

ALERT ALERT BIG DICK NICK IS BIG DICKIN'

AHHAHAHAHAHHA NOOOOOO

The checkout lady at Whole Foods got mad as hell that I was buying heart-shapped ground beef patties for my little guys' valentines dinner..! "This is going TOO far 🙄😒" ummmm who pissed in your conversational hearts ma'am

I spent an inordinate amount of time trying to find this emoji online to show my friends cause I'm mad as hell it's not still in the app when it is THE MOST SPECIFIC, USEFUL EMOJI @ samsung help me

I'm never really all that patriotic ...until it's a sport

Fellow servers, or nurses, or anyone else that wears sneakers for long shifts on potentially wet floors! Trying to gather advice on good non-slip shoes. Are Hokas worth it? Or are New Balance / Sketchers just fine at half the price? What's your fave? I'm tired of googling 😅

Finally watched Bo Burnham's Inside - I can't remember the last time I watched something and didn't once want to pick up my phone. I avoided it forever cause I figured it would fuck me up and guess what! It did!!!

Hi! Back for advice! Anyone ditch brick-and-mortar banks for online-only? Cap1, AmEx, etc My current institution pissed me off so I'm shopping 😅 Since moving, we're already using 100% online.. wondering if there's something I'm not thinking of that would make me regret it?

Me: I need to chill on snapchat, no one needs to know every aspect of my mundane life Me at 11am: "okay close friends please watch how much i love to use this dough whisk and how easy it is to clean"

I can't stop buying cookbooks and subscribing to new online cooking sites; there is not enough time in 20 lifetimes to use the recipes I've bought/saved.. i need an intervention

"I'm gonna stop buying bread at the store and start making my own to save money" LmfaOOOOOOOOOOOO

No one wanted to play with me as a little kid / So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since / To make them love me and make it seem effortless / this is the first time I've felt the need to confess / and I swear / I'm only cryptic and Machiavellian cause I care ♥