Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night

I love Kris Kristofferson.

This is still the funnest tweet I’ve ever seen on this platform

People ask why I'm still here. You're telling me I get to watch a top 5 asshole in the world lose $44-billion in real time, and you want me to leave???

My house is torn apart can someone kill me?

I’ve seen dead people on my timeline everyday for over a year and last night is what was supposed to bring me to tears?

“I hope that Benjamin Netanyahu burns in hell — shame on Israel. Shame on what you've done and it will never be forgotten.” —Irish MP Thomas Gould🇮🇪🇵🇸 👏🔥 x.com/Nadira_ali12/s…

Anybody know where I can find the fuckin wherewithal?

I hope all Zionist’s wake up in a hell tenfold as bad as the hell they’ve created in Palestine.

I am a shop vac that thirsts for cheap beer and hungers for the dollar menu.

*Me getting my bussy busted wide open* “That’s so cash money”

This today and always.

Fuck #Israel🇮🇱

Really need to start adding “chief” to my daily lexicon.