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is porn bad? well, it could be a lot better, that's for sure

when you post an angry braindead take you get the opposite angry braindead take in the replies when you post a measured nuanced take you get the angry braindead version of your take in the replies unfortunately

my girlfriend goes to a different tpot, you wouldn't know her

your toilet paper should be like the girl you bring home: soft, but with integrity that's why I only use Charmin Ultra Strong and only date autistic girls with DDs

phone died, can't get new model in store without ordering online, can't login to t-mobile without receiving a code via SMS gonna be living in the moment, no cell phone in sight. if anyone needs me, walk into Lighthaven PR Department and shout "hey yashkaf!"

dating tip: girls love it when you remember little details about their lives. her birthday, her pet's name, the code to her building, her route from work and where the CCTV blind spots are, her favorite chocolate

Saul couldn't believe that I used to look like him, but in fact I just suffered from early onset twink death

I've visited the bay enough times to walk past fented out hobos unbothered, but I just saw a guy stir five sugar packets into a medium latte one by one and it left me shaken

girls love a guy who's a bit heroic in the face of encroaching darkness