Don’t you hate it when you say what you think everyone is thinking but then you realize no one was thinking it and then you have quit your job and move to a new city?

Was once dumped by an ex for being "the drunkest woman he had ever seen" and I can't help but feel a little proud of that

You ever read a girls statuses and feel like damn I wish someone treated you right so you would shut the fuck up

I know that real adults do multiple loads of laundry for different colored clothes but I've been putting all my clothes in at the same time and i'm just saying nothing bad has happened yet

Some of ya'll never lied to your parents about being at a sleepover when you were really dead in a field from drinking too much vodka and it shows

in some personal news, i'm thrilled to announce that i'm tired all day no matter how much sleep I get

Very true

A+ procrastinator

pure panic zone

Dodging these problems

Valid point

Hey that is somewhat productive

heck yeah boiiii

yikes slam the brakes on that

I've got the travel bug

Remember in school when u were sitting in class and contemplating on asking to go to the bathroom so u can kill some time during that class but some asshole raised his hand and beat u to it so now u have to wait at least 15 minutes after he came back to ask? Ya fuck those moments

"Use your own words, don't just copy from the text book" Book: "she was born in 1978" Me: "1978 is the year in which she was born"

When in doubt nap it out

If I had a dollar for every time someone called me short, I could pay for college, a semester abroad, a new car, and a mansion in cash.