NEWS: A Wigan financial advisor says after a career telling her clients to save for a rainy day they've now had so many rainy days that they've been forced to move to Stubshaw Cross.

NEWS: The Lathums say their forthcoming new single "Face Like Thas Chewin a Wasp" could well divide opinion.

RESULT: Wigan is absolutely not a sexist town. That's the unanimous verdict of a twelve-man judging panel this week.

NEWS: Due to spiralling costs and budget cuts Wigan Clowncil have announced that the Northern Lights have been switched off.

NEWS: Grand Arcade officials have caused anger by introducing "quiet hours" during the week. "What was wrong with the usual quiet days?" said their regular shopper.

NEWS: With thunderstorms predicted to break the current heatwave, Marsh Green Ferries have stated their vessels are on standby to carry striken Wiganers home in the impending floods.

NEWS: A Wigan toffee shop owner has seen his premises forcibly shut down for changing the name of his shop to "Suck Toff" overnight.

NEWS: A Wigan-based money saving expert is to launch his first book on the subject. "Shit at work, save your bog roll" will be released in the summer.

NEWS: A Wigan shopkeeper accused of selling burgers made of horse meat has been found guilty of flogging a dead horse.

NEWS: Marsh Green Ferries have confirmed their vessels will work long into the night to reach stranded passengers who merely went to change a tyre at Kwik Fit.

NEWS: Luke Marsden says his electric car is now worth so little that if he sold it he wouldn't have enough to pay his lecky bill for April.

NEWS: Wigan Airport has received a major funding boost after signing a huge sponsorship deal to be known as Galloways Wigan Airport. Although rumours of major airlines flying from there have been described as "pie in the sky"

NEWS: A man from Scholes is to take legal action after he was falsely accused of being a transvestite for saying he had a Wigan address.

NEWS: It's official, a survey has revealed Wigan's roads now have more holes than a Polo mint factory.

NEWS: After recent inflationary pressures affected their prices, Wigan's Pound Bakery is to be renamed. £1.68 Bakery will reopen under the new branding on Monday.

NEWS: We can exclusively reveal part of the new look East Stand at the Brick Community Stadium, renamed in honour of Wigan Athletic's two previous owners.

NEWS: As Wigan's Club 3000 Bingo is inundated with drug addicts, one regular told us "£2 a line is not to be sniffed at"

SPORT: As health officials say the nation should be really worried about ticks, Dave Whelan has said only if they get taken over by bloody foreigners again.

NEWS: There's concern today after the closure of Traders Corner left the town's primary school children with nowhere to buy their e-cigs.

NEWS: A Beech Hill mother of 12 who is known for never wearing underwear has been criticised for calling her latest child "Nicholas"