Date idea: you go to war and I write you heart-wrenching letters

Cops chasing me after refusing to have my bronco recalled

I’m down to eat anything, pick a place. Oh there? No, I don’t want that. Nor that. No. Not that place either. No.

Guillotine for all of em

I’ve always called it linguistic colonialism.

Show me your glasses

All this consternation over earthquakes and eclipses when all it did was herald in the demise of OJ Simpson

Gonna have Hispanic-only bathrooms called Latine latrines

Kennedy Center. National Symphony Orchestra playing Dvořák’s 9th symphony

💀🤣

Bro sits down to take a piss

3/3 😔

Speaking of OJ Simpson, this is wild

The grim reaper showing up to OJ Simpson’s deathbed

OJ Simpson died? Wow.

POV: OJ Simpson arriving at Heaven’s door

RIP OJ 😔

If they don’t do this for OJ’s procession to the funeral home that’s a missed opportunity

I’d take the gloves off and take a stab at an OJ pun but it wouldn’t fit so I’ll quit