Thank you, Dan Orlovsky, for not just talking about it but being about it! #PrayForDamar

ESPN all picking the Jags with confidence… 👀👀👀

15 yards for a late hit out of bounds. The runner clearly stepped out well before the defender initiated contact. Silly foul…

Me: “Hey Haley, what’s San Francisco’s team name?” Haley: “Aren’t they the 69’ers?” Me: “You are so close, but also not even close.”

My 4yr old when I tell him it’s time to cleanup and go night night…

Oh yeah!!! And NorthField Church is looking forward to another great year!

That T-Mobile commercial was the energy we needed after the Tubi heart attack…

Hands down, the greatest birthday encouragement I received this year was this… Anonymous: “So, how old are you again?” Me: “32!” Anonymous: “Wow! 32 and 3 kids…that sucks!” 😂😂😂 😭😭😭

Just had a full-on conversation IN A PUBLIC RESTROOM on how urinals are for peepee only, not poopoo. 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️ #ConversationsWithA4YearOld

How do y'all explain social norms to your children? My son sharted in his pants for the SECOND time this week without telling anyone... Where's the parenting book on this one?!

Tough break, Andy Burgbacher

Friends, I’m v excited to announce that I’m hitting the road this summer with noted American rock band Matchbox Twenty. Tickets are on sale now! Come enjoy a good old fashioned summer tour, and retweet for a chance to win a pair of tickets!

I think you mean married for 16 years and three kids...

What’s your favorite ice cream and how long has it been Cookie Two Step?

Look man, all I’m saying is T-Pain is publishing cover songs now. What a time to be alive…

Relates very closely to this beautiful poem: Make the ordinary come alive, the extraordinary will take care of itself.

Watching the Dude Perfect Pickleball Trick Shots video, because I’m a 32 year old boy who hasn’t missed a video, and my wife says, “I wonder how many times it takes them to make the shot.” I responded, “First try every time, they are professionals.” I got you, fellas!! 🫡✊🏼

The baseball under the fireworks scene in ‘The Sandlot’ STILL gives me chills…

Call it the calming sensation of rhythmic patterns all you want, but you’re not convincing me with coincidence on why my newborn daughter immediately stopped crying at the onset of the instrumental version of ‘The Next Episode’ by Dr. Dre. I’m not buying it. I won’t.