Remember those little plastic bread tie thingys? Not any more! They are cardboard now!

People keep talking that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza. They don't put it unless you ask for it! Let's move on now!

I recently watched a young lady (late teens, early 20s max) back out of a drive way onto a relatively busy street using nothing but her back up camera! Head never moved! If it's not on a screen in front of them, it doesn't exist!

This is sarcasm. I'm making fun of bigots and morons.

I can properly fold a corner sheet! - me flirting with women my age!

When I was young, kids always wanted to hear their name through the Magic Mirror at the end of Romper Room. I wanted to walk down the hallway in Get Smart! youtu.be/o2ObCoCm61s?si…

Being the hot one in my group of friends is tiring!

Trying something… if you see this like, comment and RT

Michele and Shirley must be twins and they both liked different comments! What are the odds?!

Some of you have been following me for a few years now. Anyone willing to sign my passport application?!

Is it petty to say that I'm not happy with how my birthday was "celebrated"?!

These underwear make my penis look strange!

Watching all three Equalizer movies tonight. Denzel is great but a vengeful Denzel is awesome!

I'll wear this as a badge of honor!

24 hours ago, I was having a cigarette on this very balcony, wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants!

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

Three years ago today, this little lady joined our family!

My GF is watching Bridgerton. I'm not. If anyone wants to know what happens, ask me because she tells me EVERYTHING that happens in EVERY scene in EVERY episode!

For a male, folding women's lingerie is not easy! Bras, bralettes, tank tops, boy cut underwear, thongs . . . but I did it on my first 17 kills so I'm not going to change it up now! #serialkillerprobs

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary